Are you stressed? Irritable? Having poor concentration? Difficulty sleeping or sitting still? Experiencing stomach and bowel problems? All of these symptoms and more can be indicators that stress is becoming too high. Life is difficult and stress is unavoidable but stress must be managed not eliminated, denied or avoided. Stress can be constructive or destructive depending on how we manage it. Constructive stress allows us to push through difficult challenges like learning a new job, coping with the challenge of a new baby, moving to a new place, or giving a speech-all of which are stressful and a personal growth experience. However stress becomes destructive when it continues day after day, week after week, without a break and an intentional decision to rest, relax or play in some small way. (I call this taking "mini vacations.") Our mind, our body and our spirit will begin to break down. Today we plop in front of the television or a computer hoping to relax but without much benefit, and loading our mind with more information. The body may be resting but the mind is still being stimulated and receiving input which adds to your already stress-filled mind. Our mind and body operate in a slower rhythm while we sleep and are designed by God to bring rest, renewal and refreshment. While we sleep, our mind processes the thoughts, feelings and experiences of the day. When stress becomes destructive, sleep gets disrupted and physical, mental and/or spiritual symptoms begin to show up. Restful sleep is essential for wellbeing as is taking "mini vacations,"- simple things such as a walk, smelling a flower, petting a cat, or closing your eyes for a moment to take in a few deep breaths.

   Our bodies are "fearfully and wonderfully made," alerting us all day long through our senses to hear, smell, feel, see and think our way through our experiences. We become busy and easily desensitized to the senses, living on automatic pilot, and missing cues within our body that give us important information such as a clenched jaw or fist, tight muscles, etc. Our mind and body are able to cope and adjust to many and varied stressors but, just like our car, can't be pushed too hard or too long without experiencing negative and costly results. The dashboard of your car will flash a red light alerting you that something is wrong. You can ignore it but usually with very expensive consequences. Our body's "dashboard" indicates high stress as well. When the nervous system goes into a fight, flight or freeze stress response, the heart rate increases, palms get sweaty, breathing changes, blood vessels contract, and pupils dilate. As stress and anxiety build over time, the senses (your "dashboard") alert you to damaging symptoms such as a clenched jaw, tight muscles, restlessness, depressed mood, panic attacks, stomach and bowel problems, angry outbursts, immune system breakdown, sleeplessness, etc. Amazingly, we can deal with stress and intense situations daily but we can not sustain high stress day after day, week after week, over a long period of time without negative, costly outcomes.

   Our culture has lost the art of rest and relaxation. In some cultures, people take an afternoon nap routinely. The 15 minute coffee break was started to help employees be more productive, though often that time is used for many other purposes, but not rest. Sunday used to be a day of rest, but no longer! It becomes a day of more stress as we attempt to get things done we didn't get done during the week. We spend time with a friend or family but stay attached to the phone, Ipad or computer game-more input! We go on vacation hoping to relax, only to return home exhausted from so much fun, needing a vacation to recover!

   Life is busy! There is always work to be done. We are experiencing huge stressors in our culture today like never before. Stress and illness may be unavoidable but if we are intentional in the practice of calming the mind and body, we can experience a healthier and more contented existence even amidst difficult daily stressors, illnesses, situations we have no control over, and over-the-top-problems. Jesus's words, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you. . ." (John 14:27), are as relevant today as when he spoke them. They comfort and remind us we can have peace in the midst of all circumstances. We can not "shut off" or "empty" the mind but we can learn to quiet it, shifting the focus to rest and relaxation even when awake. But we must be intentional about it. The latest brain research shows that prayer, meditation, relaxing music, progressive muscle relaxation, yoga and guided imagery are all effective ways to "quiet the mind." Practiced regularly and intentionally, we can shift our focus, inviting the Spirit of Peace into our inner world of being. Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God." This is an amazing prescription to benefit our body, mind and spirit.

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Char Sandberg is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and has been providing counseling services at the Meier Clinics in Wheaton, Illinois, since 1995.  Char recorded a relaxation CD on which she talks the listener through an exercise of deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation while listening to beautiful music.  Her CD is available for purchase at the Meier Clinics in Wheaton or by going to her website www.anewwaydirect.com.

 For more information about Focus on the Family, call 855-771-HELP or visit www.focusonthefamily.com.